Features
Images from Animals Talking in All Caps
It's just what it sounds like.
A goat who wants to sell you some meth.
A giraffe who might be violating his restraining order.
An alpaca with a very dirty secret.
A cat who’s really mad at you for cancelling Netflix instant.
These are just a few of the hilariously human animals you’ll meet in Animals Talking in All Caps. Inspired by the wildly popular blog of the same name and including some of the site’s best-loved entries as well as gobs of never-before-seen material, these pages provide a brilliantly unhinged glimpse into the animal mind.
THANKS FOR LISTENING. I’M SORRY TO LAY ALL THIS ON YOU.
I JUST DIDN’T KNOW WHO ELSE TO TURN TO.
HOLY SHIT. STEVE THE TUBE. I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SINCE HIGH SCHOOL. HOW ARE YOU? STILL A TUBE I SEE. THAT’S COOL. I’M IN ADVERTISING NOW. I WORK DOWN ON 35TH.
- OH, ME? JUST CUTTING PICTURES OF RYAN GOSLING OUT OF MY WEEKLIES FOR A COUPLE MORE HOURS THEN TAKING A BUBBLE BATH. THE USUAL.
DRAW MY CHARIOT, PROLE.
I AM SHEILA, QUEEN OF THE BASKET.
I FORGOT OUR SAFEWORD! LARRY, I FORGOT THE SAFEWORD!
WELCOME HOME, BABY.
OOPS, YOU DON’T HAVE ONE ANYMORE.
NEXT TIME YOU THINK ABOUT CHEATING ON ME, MATT, DON’T.
I AIN’T GOT NO PANTIES ON.